Friday's Flashback

The Friday Feature on my humble blog will be a re-posting of the key entries to my blog called "The Big C,"  where I chronicled our whole experience with breast cancer.

I'm re-posting because

a) I have wanted for some time to make a leaner version of that material for the sake of someone else who might profit from the journey.  After enough Friday's, I'll have one.

b) I have made many new friends since the whole cancer thing, and they ask questions about it, having not read the blog or walked that journey with me.  So now's their chance.

c) It's a pretty great story.  No reason not to re-tell it.



Where it began in print:  An e-mail to my family members, which I dreaded having to write, but which had to be written.


June 11, 2009
Subject: Important News



Hello Everyone



The following is not good news, and I'm sharing it over e-mail so as not to repeat the same conversation 6 times (though I did just talk with Mom and Dad on the phone).

I have breast cancer.

I found a lump on the right side, near the arm pit. Went in to have it checked last Thursday. That nurse practitioner ordered an ultra sound and mammogram right away, which I did that same morning.

The radiologist read it right there and ordered a biopsy and MRI, which I just did this morning at the Air Force Academy. All of which is a very good start to my next hilarious book, the working title of which is "The Cancer Chronicles."

(Featuring the following story from this morning's biopsy:

The doctor was about to stick the needle in to give me the numbing lydocain when he stopped and said, "You know, I don't think you do, but I have to ask. Do you have implants?"

You don't think I do?  What was the give-away, doc?)
They are expediting the biopsy results so that we'll get them tomorrow. I should say here that it's not official yet. But the nurse practitioner is right now setting up a surgical consult for me so that when the results arrive, I can meet with the surgeon immediately.

The radiologist and biopsy guy both did things that indicated how concerned they were--e.g. ordering an MRI along with the biopsy instead of waiting for biopsy results first, which is the usual, and taking 8 samples instead of 6--so I asked the nurse what the warning bells were that were causing so much concern. The lump is irregular in shape, it casts a shadow and calcification spots showed up on the mammo. And it's on a lymph node.

I feel confident that I'm in good hands, and am very thankful they are all working so quickly on my behalf. I haven't said anything to you all this week because I didn't see the need to cause needless concern. But now I might well go into surgery by Friday night/sometime this weekend, and with the kids at Betsy's (she took them for the whole day), now is a good time to write this e-mail.

I will surely keep you all posted on the results tomorrow and the surgeon's consult.

Most importantly, I have to tell you about the amazing week between last Thursday--when I thought they'd tell me this was just a swollen lymph node--to today.

It has been the most joyful week of my life. Truly. The first day or so, I was fraught with all the typical emotions we'd expect. But starting with the church service we went to on Saturday night and continuing on without interruption, God has been pouring joy and peace on me.

Not coincidentally, this is our Vacation Bible School week--for Gemma and Josh, and for me as I've been leading games for the little ones. Every morning I've been surrounded by dear friends, and worship songs that remind me of God's power and His faithfulness.

And as I've prayed, and as Bryan has, and Betsy, too, the answer back has been repeatedly that there are trials ahead, but that this isn't going to kill me, and that God will bring mighty blessings out of it.

So, in this way, it's a pretty exciting time for us.

I know that not all of you can relate to what I've described. But I tell you about it in the hope that it will lessen your concern for me. I am in Good and Loving Hands.  :)


I'm cutting and pasting a prayer that my dear friend, Mandy, offered for me because
a) it made me laugh and
b) it reminds me of the wonderfully supportive place I'm in right now. I hope it helps you, too.

love

Amella!


Dear God,

Lord, this really sucks!! Praise You for being Sovereign over all things.

Amy is your most precious daughter, the Apple of Your eye! Her life is an act of worship to you and her Love for you is contagious.

God You are always good and we are asking You, in Your Most Holy Name, to give Amy an abundant and joyfilled and Long life!!! Jesus thank you for Amy and what you have already done in her life. We praise You Yaweh for the Wife and Mother and Friend she is and the pure Joy and fun she exudes!!

My prayer for Amy is long life and long boobs... meaning she will see the day when those big girls can be tied around her waist. Thank you Lord. Bless Amy and her family tomorrow and in the coming weeks, and we trust you God. Asking You for Complete healing in Your Name. Amen.